CLASSIC BRAINSTORMS FROM OUR ARCHIVES
We've brainstormed topics ranging from deeply personal issues to formal, challenging business matters.
Want help naming your business? Naming your baby? Talking to your daughter-in-law? Mother-in-law? (Or not!) Deciding about parenthood? Celebrating a major life event? Entertaining your elderly parents? Increasing your business? Deciding about retirement?
You can have the benefits of brainstorming these and countless other subjects with creaative, energetic and wise women. Start your own group and see what you can come up with.
- I'm a web designer. How can I learn to tighten up so I get paid for all the work I do?
- What are some of the factors to consider in when (or whether) to have a child?
- How can I prepare to make a potentially disastrous family meeting effective?
- How can I overcome my negativity about having a love in my life?
- How can I use a job interview to determine if it's a place I want to work?
- How to survive parenting a teenage boy or girl
- How do I envision retirement and begin to think about next phase of my life?
- What do I call the time between jobs?
- What can I do with my elderly parents when they come to visit? (My Father can walk only short distances)
- What can I do to heal relationship with estranged daughter-in-law?
- Ideas and advice for me about renting out a room in my house (and I could use help in furnishing it)
- Tips for creative ways to learn Spanish
I'm a web designer. How can I learn to tighten up so I get paid for all the work I do?
Notify each client of your fees in writing before you start working for them
Look at your 'slidetime' and build $60/hour slidetime into your original fee
Change your fee to reflect the extra work you do
Do some personal work on valuing what you do
Go shadow an attorney and watch how they bill for their time
Find out what your peers are doing
When you give a new client a contract, spell out what is and is not included
Try to separate personal and professional relationships
Read "When I Say No, I feel Guilty"
Look at what you give in time for which you don't charge
Recognize that in service work, there is always time that can't be billed
Put post-its around the computer to remind you of your goal
Set a timer – it can help you decide to stop or to charge
Take a retainer, and tell them they are working off it.
Give them warning when they are close to it being used up
Add 20% for overhead
Pretend to have a business mgr you have to check in with before you make a commitment
Keep meticulous records of the time
Have daily, weekly, monthly goals. How much do you need to earn? Make sure you aren't giving your time away
Pay your virtual business mgr
Expect this to be a learning process
Pay a coach or a real business manager
Post your monthly expenses on your computer
Practice tough love
Look in the mirror
Smile when you say, "I want to help you and this is what it is going to cost"
What are some of the factors to consider in when (or whether) to have a child?
Realize that there is never a perfectly right time to have a child
Go with your gut
Stop your birth control now
Realize it can take a long time to become pregnant, not just one try
Once you're pregnant you have almost a year to adjust to the idea
Realize you can have a child and have a life at the same time
Think twice about that, think about what you're willing to give up
Give yourself a little more time to get set with the writing, sometime where it is not immediate, but not too far away
Make sure you know as much as you can about the other parent
Ask your husband what he thinks about it
Make sure you record the conversation you have with your partner
Then have it transcribed and have him sign it
Make sure its legally binding
Think about the big picture of your life and how this fits in
Talk to your friends who've had babies and find how early they started
Read "Operating Instructions" by Ann Lamott
Spend some time around new babies
Interview new mothers and write an article about them
Interview other women to find out how they made the decision
Know that family is important
Know that you'll be tired at 18 or 64 it doesn't matter
"With all my accomplishments and travel in my life, I consider my kids my greatest production"
Consider it a long term investment in many ways, emotionally, psychologically, it's a career – you're building something
Know that writing is the perfect job if you want to stay at home and have kids
No matter what you do you'll have to have child care
You can do everything, just not all at the same time
Think about your writing community as a community in which you can trade off child care, etc.
How can I prepare to make a potentially disastrous family meeting effective?
Bring Hershey kisses
Dispense hugs
Sedate your mother
Hire a mediator
Think about what you learned about divorce mediation
Send a letter to your family before you go
Have a values assessment discussion about what they really value
Give them a values assessment test
Write out your ideas ahead of time
Identify an ally in the group to help you stay grounded
Tell that person ahead of time what you might need
Note what's going to drive you crazy and identify
Anticipate your problem areas and create a mantra
Identify what you want from the meeting
Think about what their fears are
Give mother space to address her fears
Write down your judgments about the people and their opinions so you can
be free of them when you are there
Express the emotions /get them out
Find a neutral position; be out of the caretaker role
Take breaks
Remember your purpose in coming together
Remember active listening as a tool
Most effective person listens the most
Take lots of bathroom breaks
Drink a lot of water
Wear the superpower underwear you wore to divorce mediation
Wear no underwear
Wear lavender aromatherapy
Giggle occasionally
Ask if they would be willing to hold hands, be silent, and center together for 1 minute
Use a timer or talking stick so no one person dominates the discussion
Pretend you are a scientist or observer who has come to observe
Think of this as grist for the mill and publish an essay about this experience
Decide what your bottom line is
Establish ground rules at the beginning
How can I overcome my negativity about having a love in my life?
Choose specific time frame per day or week and act as if you are totally
going to find love this week
Behave as if you believe
Be cocky about yourself
Know that its OK to be shy and beautiful as you looked when you began to frame this question
Pick a day when you are out and about and smile at 50 people
Go windsurfing
Buy slut red nail polish
Smile mysteriously to yourself
Get a tattoo on your right buttock
Create an affirmation about this and write it 50 time/day
Wear sexy underwear
Make a list of what you want to change about your attitude
Make a list of all the men you know that you have regard for, and what you regard in them
Do a personal inventory of your fears and of your desires about a relationship
Give up trying to reason yourself into this new state of mind
Do a dialogue between the two parts of you
Listen to music
Listen to romantic music
Seek out poetry readings
Write poetry
Follow a good-looking man around incognito
Try dating online
Flirt online
Read Nancy Blachman's book "Putting Your Heart Online"
Make some male friends thru hiking and bicycling groups
Go to a center where you can teach ESL. Meet foreign men
Examine your ambivalence: on a scale of 1 to 10 how would you rate your desire for a relationship
Daydream
Take some time to think of every relationship you've had and unhook yourself from all these old ones
Take a salsa dancing class
Buy Susan Page's book "If I'm So Wonderful, Why am I Still Single?"
How can I use a job interview to determine if it's a place I want to work?
Have fun in your interview
Find out how long they've been in business.
Find out what potential there is for advancement
Focus on getting the job. Then think about if it's the right place
Be genuinely curious about the job and the place.
In your second interview, ask to meet other employees
Do research before the interview.
Think about it like a marriage and consider compatibility
Check out the furniture, the environment, ventilation
How many buttons will there be on your phone
Smiles on people in the office
Ask all your questions before you accept the position
Notice how people are dressed
What is their philosophy on training
Identify what's important to you in a job, then ask questions
that focus on that.
Rehearse those questions with a friend or colleague so you can say them with confidence
Believe firmly that they want to hire an employee who really wants to work with them, and pitch your interview to that belief
If not, pitch yourself out as quickly as possible
Do informational interviews first
Check out the restrooms
Check out the bulletin board
Talk to people in the bathroom
Talk to people in the lunchroom
Check for graffiti
Don't accept a job that doesn't excite you
Write your criteria before you go in
Be willing to revise your criteria
Consider ergonomics
Talk to someone with a similar job
How to survive parenting a teenage boy or girl
Read "Get Out of My Life but First Drive Me and Cheryl to the Mall"
Help him write short and long term goals for himself
Take him to a movie, to a stupid restaurant, or whatever he'd like
Talk to him about trivia when he won't talk about anything bigger
Listen to what he says to others
Warn him that mother sometime get over being mothers before teenagers get over being teenagers
Ask him how he feels about you being more independent and having your own life
Suggest that he get involved in an internship of some kind
Talk to other parents of teens
Tell him there are teen hot lines manned by teens
Ask him if he minds you renting out his room when he leaves
Grin and bear it
Know he'll be a human being in 5 years or 25 years
Talk to people who think he's the neatest kid on earth
Find one good thing he does every day
Write it down
Put it on the refrigerator for him to see
Give him a gold star for these good things
Leave a blank space for him to write in every day
Ask him to tell you one good thing you've done every day
Find out if there's one big thing that's bugging him
Buy him Hershey kisses
Expect to be the object of his venting
Ask him if he wants you to help him find a college or a job
Don't take it serious if he calls you names
Send him to Outward Bound. To the Forum
Keep her very busy
Meet parents of her friends
Meet her friends. Spend time with them
Get to know the groups in your community
Make your home the hub of teen activities
Make a list of what you are willing to put up with
Don't be afraid to be tough
Keep your sense of humor
Be curious about her new way of being
Talk to her teachers
When she tells you how stupid a teacher (or a friend) is, just listen.
Don't make excuses for the teachers
Let her see how a professional woman takes care of herself and her family
Talk to her about being a woman
Create traditions for transforming to womanhood
Pray and ask your friends to pray
Start thinking about your life when she moves out
Make this your #1 priority
Set time for the two of you to talk
Set time for the family to be together
Listen to her to talk to you about what's really going – without judgment or criticism
Let her know your values
Try to have fun with her, doing things you both enjoy
Encourage her dreams of what her life will be
Seize every opportunity to discuss a book or a movie-especially with regard to character development
Tell her if she wants to get drunk, experience it at home.
Create a space for yourself where the terrible things she says to you stay outside, not inside of you
Don't think the worst of her experiments
Be very clear about her top 5 responsibilities. If she's
meeting those top 5, don't worry
Don't forget to breathe
Make sure you and your husband are in accord
How do I envision retirement and begin to think about next phase of my life?
Hang out with people who are successfully retired
Expand on what gives you enjoyment now
Sit in a coffee shop with a book and see how that feels
Write several drafts of short story- about a 56 yr old woman
Think about the things you love most in your job
Moments in the day that bring you joy
Make lists of why do I want to retire, what will I do?
Transition year-part-time
Don't use word retirement
You don't have to know what will come before you do it
Meditate
Helps to be in the moment
Read the Elderhostel catalog
Know that it will take a year to feel good about it
Know that it will take one day to feel good about it
Internal photo album-pictures about retirement that please you
Accept that it's scary
Think about times when you weren't busy and how you felt then
What dreams haven't you fulfilled
Drop in on retirement group-talk to people
Make a dream board
Survey retirees
Imagine four scenarios and notice your feelings around each
This decision will not be made in your head
What do I call the time between jobs?
Serial retirements
Innie-outie
None of your goddam business
Serial sabbaticals
Advanced dilettantism
Independent consultant who operates on a project basis
Cultural creative
Cultural creator
Independent contractor
Episodically energetic
Episodically employed
episodically unemployed
Unpigeonholed
Living life
Eclecticly employed
Renaissance woman
Cultural hiatus
Lucky in labor
Work-recycler
Work-cycler
Impermanent professional
Discriminating dilettante
New professional
Cyclically employed
Seasonally retooled
Available
Intentional hiatus
Accidental employee
OOOF Occasionally Occupied Occasionally Free
Occasionalist
Balanced with leisure lifestyle
Corporately aloof
Balanced
Unincorporated
Work in progress
Work-sabbatical cycle
Employed by whim
Liberated creationist
Temporarily out of service
Self-unemployed
Self-unemployed executive (a SEX-worker)
What can I do with my elderly parents when they come to visit? (My Father can walk only short distances)
Get a walker or wheelchair and have it available
Hornblower Yacht cruise brunch on the bay
Wine train in Napa
Go to the movies
SF Experience in Ghiradelli Square
Matinees
Go to Imax
Rent some old cowboy movies
Rent a convertible and take them sightseeing
Get assisted listening devices for the movies
Take them someplace outdoors where they can just sit.
Buy lightweight folding camping chairs
Take them up in hot air balloon
Check out Senior Center activities while they're here.
Berkeley Pier has benches-Take a slow walk there
Kennedy Grove on San Pablo Dam Rd is flat and has benches
Get temporary disability permit for parking
Have someone do a videotape/history with them
Invite people to come over and meet them for coffee or lunch
Have them look at family photos and tell you about them
Think of one activity per day
When you talk to them, think of things they'll be interested in talking about
Ask lots of questions
Don't take it personally
Go out to eat; get food delivered
Build in an appointment of something you have to go to
(e.g., get your nails done, go for a massage)
Have someone to call to vent
Think of things you could use their advice about, like something to fix or something you need to buy or some area where they might have useful advice
Use this opportunity to learn what your Mother's all time favorite books are and WHY
Do the same with your Dad and his movies
You will have the opportunity someday to relay these answers to younger people–your children, grandchildren, nieces, nephews etc.
Book a spa/massage day for the day after they leave
What can I do to heal relationship with estranged daughter-in-law?
Love her, love her love her
Accept things the way they are
Focus on her positive characteristics
Ask yourself if your objections are gender-related
P ractice ignoring your children - they come closer that way
Don't indulge in criticism - explicit, subtle or implied
Issue invitations without expectation
Welcome children whenever they come
Make both son and wife feel individually important
Don't try to turn him against her
Practice patience with yourself
Be available to listen
Let their marriage mature
Accept their relationship
Surrender
Get to know her as a separate person
Plan informal, buffet family gatherings where absence or length of stay won't be obvious
Don't keep score
Ask her how you can support her goals
Ask her lots of questions
Ask how you can help
Act as tho you do have a relationship
See things from her point of view
Stop praying they don't have children
Ideas and advice for me about renting out a room in my house (and I could use help in furnishing it)
Be clear about your boundaries. What are you willing to share in your house?
Contact airlines human resources departments
Contact Inger re foreign students
UC language studies-You have to do a bit more-like speaking English and feed them breakfast
Mills College
American Language Institute
Think carefully about what rules you'd like to make
Research on Craig's list to see what's out there
Create an interview list of questions
Make a list of your expectations
Find out about Human Investment Project
Think about someone who needs a sometime place
Commuter airline people
Start out doing this temporarily month-to-month until you get your sea legs
Ask questions about cooking, alcohol, smoking, if they have visitors who spend the night
Make a 'house guidelines' list
Graduate students in physical sciences are never home
Doctors and nurses work long shifts
Traveling nurses - contact nurse recruiters at hospitals
Research legal issues about getting them out
Go to storage unit sale
Rent it furnished or unfurnished
Get a good bed, desk, chair if you want to get a good price
Research rent rolls
UC Housing office can give you advice
Large corporations may need short-term housing for temp staff.
Tips for creative ways to learn Spanish
Sleep with a Spanish-speaking man
Watch Spanish TV
Watch children's shows in Spanish
Live in a Spanish-speaking household
Help out in a bilingual school
Go to Costa Rica and you'll learn Spanish
Week-end in Espanol in SF
Go to community college
Find ESL students and do conversation exchange with them
Rent movies with subtitles. Watch them twice/reading and not reading the subtitles
Read ads in Spanish magazines
Put post-its around the house with Spanish words for objects (like mirror, chair)
Make a Spanish speaking friend and go for a walk several times a week
Learn your Spanish according to themes like hospitals, restaurants
Keep a Spanish dictionary with you at all times
Keep a list of words you are learning
Hang out in a Mexican bakery
Make one day 'Spanish day' at home and speak only Spanish with your family.
Don't worry about tenses
Whenever you get voicemail with Spanish option, choose that
Go to Spanish school in Yucatan 24 hour a day classes
Volunteer at Spanish-speaking nursery school
Immersion
Someplace playful
Put a posting on craigslist for someone to practice Spanish with you
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